Fan Interview With Lauralee

Just who exactly is a Morrissey fan?

A Fan interview with Lauralee Markley, aged 48, Los Angeles

I am a well-defined average, middle-aged (48) white, educated, affluent, divorced, American female, born and raised in Los Angeles. I’ve been devoted to Morrissey since I was a kid.

What is it that resonates between you and him?

Morrissey provided me with the soundtrack of my life.
In 1984 when Hatful of Hollow came out, I was a depressed kid who fit in nowhere. Morrissey was there for me.
In 1986 when the Queen is Dead came out, I had failed miserably at my first relationship and was devastated. Morrissey was there for me.
In 1990 when Bona drag came out, I hated myself because my existence consisted of isolation, loneliness and heartache Morrissey was there for me.
In 1994 when Vauxhall and I came out, I was in college but I knew I’d be a failure in the future. Morrissey was there for me.
In 2004 when You are the Quarry came out, I was in a loveless marriage that haunted me every night. Morrissey was there for me.
In 2006 When Ringleader came out, I was at the top of my game, in a career that I loved, and was very successful. I heard the song At Last I am Born. Morrissey was there for me.
In 2014 When World Peace is None of the Your Business came out, I finally got the nerve to end my marriage, however, was lost, hurt and alone. Morrissey was there for me.
And now, 2020, when I feel so old that I don’t recognize the image that reflects back in the mirror, I am not a Dog on a Chain comes out. As always, Morrissey is there for me.

How has he inspired you?

Morrissey helped me so much during my life. He got me through depression, heartbreak and the overall feeling I did not belong, His voice and lyrics let me know there was somebody out there who understood. That knowledge, that one person could make a difference in someone else’s life inspired me to be that in other peoples lives. I became a psychotherapist, specializing in depression. I wanted other people to feel what I was lucky enough to have, someone who is there for me.

Do you have a story about how you discovered him?

In 1984 I was 14. I was sunbathing in my backyard, reflecting on why my life was so lonely and miserable. It was a time in my life when I was not eating because I thought if I could be skinnier or prettier or smarter, I would be liked by others. I clearly remember the words that came on my radio that day. “I am human and I need to be loved just like everybody else”. As I listened to these words I clearly remember thinking finally, finally, somebody understood me. I’ve been devoted to Morrissey ever since.

Have you got any tattoos that are inspired by him?

On my neck is Southpaw Grammar. My right wrist simply says, Morrissey.

Anything else you would like to add?

Last night I dreamt life was taking me away
Into a feast of deformity
While I bled every drop of my self worth
To bow to the knees of life’s conformity
So I stole the stars from the sky
While I watched millions of constellations die
I stole all the colors out of the world
Only to watch new colors swirl
I tried to pull out all of nature’s seeds
And plant them into me
So I could give birth to a brand new breed
Who saw something different as an eternity
I gave silence to a sound
And picked all the daisies from the ground
And turned the flowers to black
So the soil of this world could never come back
I tried to destroy the laughing ocean
That brought all creations near
I dropped in a killing potion
So nature’s journey would not reappear
I tried to set time on fire
And bury all ancestral kings and sires
I tried to hypnotize the devil’s snake
So he wouldn’t be able to tempt Eve’s fate
And every change I made
Sent forth an exotic flower
Only soon to die and fade
And everything was the same the very next hour

If you would also like to submit a fan interview, you can do so at this link:
Just Who Exactly Is a Morrissey Fan?